On Dreams

"Do you dream in color?"

I remember my friend in high school asked me that once. We were running down the genetic traits that supposedly made people more creative. My buddy was destined to be the next Van Gogh. He was left-handed, right-eye dominant, had no hair on the second joint of his fingers, and of course dreamed in full vibrant Doris Day Technicolor.

In college, I had a friend who dreamt fully-realized sci-fi epics. I swear part of his brain held a Hollywood story department hostage. His dreams had problems and resolutions, inciting events and denouements; his characters had arcs and love triangles. He'd explain them and I'd want to pay money to see them.

My dreams are never that way.

In my dreams, impossibly mundane things happen like me taking a shower, surreal things like riding downtown with a bear in the driver's seat. I've had nightmares about seeing a snake hanging out in a tree. What interests me about my dreams is that they make complete sense at the time.

I got a digital voice recorder for Christmas. I use it primarily to record story tidbits that pop up at random times, but since I keep it on my nightstand I also use it to recite the occasional dream as well. These things invariably happen while I'm still half-asleep and mumble here and there with the added bonus of my croaking middle-of-night voice coming in and out of legibility.

I can barely understand these recordings. They make absolutely no sense. There has been no time for my left brain to try and make sense of them. They are raw streams of subconscious that sound very strange and personally humiliating. I figure this is just the type of thing that the Internet needs more of.

-Brian Miller.
Austin, TX


08.09.05 : Cheadle (1017 k)
In this one I guess i kill Don Cheadle and cook his arm. Who knows.

08.09.05 : Snake Dogs (4.4 MB)
OK this one's pretty messed up. Keywords are: GTA, rattlesnakes, and dog/lizard things in my old house.

06.17.05 : Pfeiffer (194 k)
I get Michelle Pfeiffer's phone number.

05.17.05 : LEGO Castle (2.7 MB)
My buddies and me spend all night working on a fantastic larger-than-life LEGO puzzle including castles, cliffs, and whatnot.

05.16.05 : Killer Whale (4.3 MB)
Something to do with Soul Coughing, Dave Chappelle, and various mammals of the sea.

05.13.05 : Big Wave (2.1 MB)
It gets really windy in this valley place tucked between cliff faces where tons of people are hanging out and a big wave washes over all of us.

05.08.05 : Easter Egg (1.7 MB)
OK I don't even remember recording this that's how asleep I was. It sounds like I am so wasted or something but I asure you that I am just asleep. That said, this is perhaps the randomest entry to date, and I should hold a contest for anyone who can figure out what the last thing I say is, cuz I sure don't know.

05.03.05 : Quannum Halloween Cheesecake (1.9 MB)
Lyrics Born and company go to a haunted house, kill a huge firey monster, and eat cheesecake.

04.24.05 : Meta (937 k)
I guess this idea is sticking to me. Here I talk about dreaming that I woke up and recorded my dream into my DVR... Try grasping an idea like that when you are just waking up. You will sound like this too.

04.18.05 : Dismembered Woes (1.3 MB)
I guess i got all chopped up when I was sleeping and had to deal with it.

04.18.05 : Owldog Protector (2.2 MB)
My neighbor shows me a weird creature that sprouts underground and inflates into a dog with an owl head that wont stop nuzzling into people's crotches.

04.18.05 : Sitcom Rapping (1.4 MB)
The King of Queens dude makes a rap video and David Schwimmer doesn't like it.